A dream of love, as they write in books. Distinguish fantasy from reality

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Love novels are very beautiful things. They are pleasant to read. Maybe you’ll understand the vicissitudes of love better yourself. Your soul will rush upward. Dreams of love will cloud your head. No doubt, the soul must be prepared to meet love. Every girl dreams of beautiful love. Does it really exist? Yes. But it doesn’t always look the way your imagination painted it.

Love, like in the books

A friend of mine once told me the story of her first love. In her last year of high school she fell in love with a handsome, well-mannered, intelligent young man. He responded to her with all the fervor of his feelings. Everything was so wonderful: romantic dates, flowers, a graduation party where they danced all the time and dreamed of the future… But then Natasha read a novel about Angelica. She walks down the street, clutching the “precious” book to her chest, and he walks toward her. Impressionable girl immediately compares his real beloved with the hero of the novel, and she gets scared! Crazy eyes looked at his recent sympathy, she shuddered away from him, ran away. After all, how could she “love” this drab, when the Count de Peyrac – oh, how beautiful! And this one?! And so ended her first love.

любовь как в книгах анжелика

Love or attraction?

The problem of “What is love?” has been taken seriously by modern science. In 1977 in England there was even a congress on “Love and Attraction. It’s not so easy to figure out where there is simple attraction and where there is love. And why do they arise?

Biologists say that there is a law of love in nature, which in the name of better offspring brings together non-random couples. It turns out that animals are able to estimate the “correspondence” of their partner to their own genotype (the seventeenth pair of chromosomes is especially important there). They also prefer partners with a set of genes that differs from their own. You’ve already studied biology and know that inbreeding leads to degeneration).

Love at first sight in humans… Like a spark, like an epiphany, like a thunderbolt out of the blue, like a gift from fate… Romantic! Biologists, on the other hand, say that the choice is made at the level of the genotype. That’s why there is a man for every woman. The catch is that a man always wants to have something better, more beautiful than the others, and through this he also asserts himself. We’ve already talked about this. But, my dear, if it were only the psychology of one man that complicated the matter…

The Fates of Kings

Many circumstances of the social order stand in the way of the biological law. From time immemorial, racial, national, religious, property and other differences have been a barrier. And the will of the parents? Even political considerations decided fates. Princesses were given in marriage to allies, kings and princes themselves married the daughters and sisters of powerful lords.

Remember how that Alla Pugacheva sang:

“Kings can do anything… And the destinies of the whole earth are sometimes decided by them. But no matter what they say, no king, no king, can marry for love!”

Some, however, succeeded. The crown was given for love by the English autocrat Edward Vlll. The prospect of his marriage to an American woman, Wallis Simpson, caused a crisis for the nation. England could not tolerate an indecent, unequal, honor-insulting marriage. Edward’s love, however, was so great that on 10 December 1936 he signed his abdication and went into exile as Duke of Windsor. On June 3, 1937, David and Wallis were married in France and lived in New York until 1972. And so it happens in this life. But very rarely. Besides, today only one in three men, as sociological research shows, value love in their lives above health, wealth and power.

есть ли любовь у королей

Even if not kings, but people with simpler lives also have to think: what will come of this love? Mothers advise their daughters to look: who and what is he, what kind of family, what education? They are more and more worried about what money and where to live.


Humans are more complex than animals. Our “little brothers” can hardly suffer because of dissimilarity of characters, selfishness, elementary boorishness. For them, love is a factor in creating better offspring. The subtleties of feelings are unknown to them. They build their relationships within one species or another in roughly the same way. And humans? Their love is so rich and varied! It depends on so many things: cultural and national environment, upbringing, living conditions. Yes, but to a much greater extent – on the character of this or that person. What determines that? Perhaps by the stars?

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Автор Елизавета Татарчук

Эксперт женского мышления. Училась в РГУ им. С. А. Есенина на факультете психологии. Хочу открыть свой бесплатный кабинет психологической поддержки.

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